Sunday Dialogue: Do You Believe In Me?

“Do you believe in me?” Asked the ghost.

“is that rhetorical?”

“I suppose that depends on your answer.”

“Probably not, then.”

“But I’m right here.”

“Sure. But I’m sitting on the toilet.”


“It’s an odd place for a ghost to haunt.”

“It’s where you are.”

“I’m probably just making you up.”


“Loneliness, probably.”

“Isn’t your partner in the next room?”


“So then how are you lonely?”

“Sometimes you can be the loneliest in a room full of people.”

“That’s nice.”

“Did you ever have a relationship?”


“Alight, if you are real, how long have you been dead?”

“Which time?”


“I might have died once, or many times. It’s uncertain.”

“You can’t remember?”

“Can you remember what you did as a kid? Sure, I have some memories, but only a few.”

“Well, you speak English well enough.”

“Or you’re just hearing it that way.”

“So. How old are you?”

“Who knows? I think I’ve been doing this for a good while, though.”

“Hanging around people’s bathrooms?”

“Chatting with people.”


“I dunno. What do you want to talk about?”

“Well, I’ve been thinking. Do you think people actually love us for us, or some idealized version?”

“Jumping right in, then.”

“You asked. I figured a ghost is as good a person to ask as any.”

“The only thing I can say is, do we ever really know another person? So I guess some of it is in your mind.”

“I’m starting to think all of it is.”

“Is that why you’ve been in the bathroom for 20 minutes?”

“No, I just had a hard time going.”

“That’s too much information.”

“You’re the one who came into this bathroom.”


“Oh, sounds like someone is calling to you.”

“Yeah, I’d better finish up.”

“Well, before you go. I’d just say: if the fantasy is close enough, that may be enough. Close is already a win.”

“Yeah, alright, get out of here. I need to wipe.”